Wednesday, January 21, 2009

Take: One


My apologies as usual. Things are a bit distracting in this city - which is quite good for me, but not so great for you. Please indulge.

Since coming to France, accomplishments & realizations include:
- Constant intoxication, sans last night
- 4 euro & 3 EUR pints of Kronenbourg are a steal, 6-8 EUR is common
- International students galore on campus; Which include the following countries:
France, Kazakhstan, India, Bangladesh, Switzerland, Sweden, Germany, Spain, UK, Brazil and more
- Internet is hard to come by
- Hallway toilets are not ideal for living
- Neither are 6-floor walk-ups
- Wine is as cheap as 1,60 EUR and up to 100+ EUR (General range: 10-40 EUR)
- The lait here is quite rich
- Cobblestone streets are quite pretty, yet devastating to shoe soles

In regards to the French people & culture:
- Speak frank, tell all
- Dislike English, but can speak if necessary
- Blank faces on naïve Americans = Priceless/annoying
- Generally all dress well, at least in urban areas (Similar to NYC)
- Generally all rather fit, few lardos
- Claim to dislike sports, yet remain in sub-34” waists for men, sub sz. 7 for ladies

Things under 10 EUR worthy of consumption:
- Sandwiches, various pastries, loaves of bread
- Cheap chinois/asian food
- Small pre-packaged sushi, 6 ct. (But beyond 6ct. is hands off)
- Sub-5kg of vegetables, to an extent
- Cheap pints (Sub-5 EUR), even cheaper “European 40oz.” (75cl) bottles of beer for 1-2,50 EUR
- Numerous bottles of cheap wine, quality being ignored due to cheap alcohol factor

Markets include the following:
- Seafood = Beautiful fresh fish, shellfish and good ol langoustines
- Fruits = Typical + some exotic touches
- Vegetables = All generally fresh, lots of green, beautiful looking tomatoes
- Meats = Everything from full rabbit carcass to livers, legs and more
- Middle-Eastern Food = Falafel and galore, who would’ve guessed?
- Moroccan/Algerian? = Tangier cooking and flat breads, pretty impressive

Food Boutiques Include:
- Patisseries = The most inviting bundle of flour & fat, convection-oven produced foods ever
- Boulangerie = Ditto on the tantalizing factor + cheap prices for good to amazing breads, depending on location
- Chocolatier = I’ve heard there are 40 EUR boxes of chocolate out there, so they must be doing something right
- General notes: I saw a cake for 65 EUR today. It looked like a masterpiece. Man, the U.S. sucks.

Grocery Shopping in France

When translated into English, the conversation between customer and cashier:
- *Silence*
- *Customer bags own groceries in a hurried manner*
- The next customer’s items begin to mix with customer #1’s items
- Both struggle to sort out items from one another’s
- “Pardon mademoiselle.”
- “C’est bon.”
- “Merci. Bon soir.”
- “Bon soir.”

Thoughts on Princess Di’s Memorial on Avenue du New York:
- Lots of French writing, handful of Anglais, tidbit of Japonais
- A golden flame monument not dedicated to her death
- “I <3 Di" = Most Prominent Eulogy

Politics en France

The French really like Obama.

BEER
4 January 09
Beer: Terriblé, Unibroue
Location: Whole Foods 6th St, Austin, TX
Price: Gratis via A. Nguyen Beer Payers
Grade: 6.8

Not too Terrible? But not all that great?

4 January 09
Beer: Tecate
Location: Whole Foods 6th St, Austin, TX
Price: Gratis via D. Edwards Ltd.
Grade: 3.0

Mex/light/cheap/for Cancun bros.

4 January 09
Beer: Miller Lite
Location: Unknown
Price: Gratis via M. Doss Apt. Drinking Appreciation Foundation
Grade: 2.0

When consumed, one will desire to vomit. However, the necessity of obtaining a state of intoxicity overules the natural displacement of such consumed liquids from the stomach. Therefore, the concept of ‘mind over matter’ is truly experience when drinking such beer.

5 January 09
Beer: Keystone Ultra
Location: Unknown
Price: Gratis via M. Doss Apt Drinking Appreciation Foundation
Grade: 0.3

Are you fucking kidding me?

5 January 09
Beer: Natural Ice
Location: Unknown
Price: Gratis via M. Doss Apt Drinking Appreciation Foundation
Grade: 0.7

Lower than Miller High Life, Schlitz, Keystone, Schaefer, Bud Light, Miller Lite, Coors Light and everything else previously considered a shitty, sub-human beer. This is beer pong urine. The drink of the low-life – not even acceptable for drinkability beyond a post-8 beer state of intoxication. Had I been drinking this earlier in the night, my mouth would have transformed into a cesspool of vomit and black plague. Luckily, I had coated my mouth with a good amount of acceptable beer before pouring this into my body. Shameful, yes. Regrettable? Never.

7 Jan 09
Beer: Spaten Oktoberfest Ur-Marzen
Location: H-E-B Louetta, Cypress, TX
Price: $10/6pk
Grade: 6.6

Sort of like Weinstephaner’s Festbier but a notch or two down. Great hoppy, yeast taste notable with German beer, especially marzens, but the palette is weak and finishes dull and sloppy. Hints of grassy notes and almost a wet hay-like taste with tiny, tiny bits of light berries. Some pine also thrown in for a really sod-ish taste in general. Not bad though, I suppose.

13 Jan 09
Beer: Sagres Mini
Location: Bosquet - AMEX, 7é, Paris, FR
Price: 4€/125cl
Grade: 4.0

I swear it tastes like champignons. Skunky water, stale hops and wet yeast. So sad.

19 Jan 09
Beer: San Miguel Lager
Location: Bosquet – AMEX, 7é, Paris, FR
Price: 4€/12oz. bottle
Grade: 5.7

Drinkable Filipino beer. Light, crisp hops but flavor is shallow. Little yeast flavor and even less pungent kick. Good to slurp down with meals, but alone this would be a foolish mistake.

21 Jan 09
Beer: Bière d’Abbaye, Brasée en Belgique, 6.2% ABV
Location: Franprix rue Paul Doumer, 16é, Paris, FR
Price: 3,36€/6pk 25cl
Grade: 7.2

Spicy orange nose with punchy hops and crisp apple bits. Good amount of coriander and cloves within its mid-hue amber color. Head is rather light with airy froth that doesn’t add much, but the drink is quite enjoyable in its quirky little way. The carbonation is what sets it apart, kicking around until it goes down the throat, there are even touches of strawberry which is quite odd. Tastes like a young beer, not one that has sat around for awhile but it still has enough flavor throughout. Cute malts with a tint of praline-like sweetness. There’s a slight metallic taste on the tip, but nothing that detracts from the overall composition of the beer. Quite lively and sort of reminds me of a crisp, autumn day. Not bad. If only it were in a larger bottle – this poured about the amount an average highball glass keeps. Eh, guess that just means I’ll have 2 or 3 more?

2 comments:

anenews said...

haha natural ICE.

you forgot to mention pearl!

The Last Bite said...

ah, i did not forget. you see, i've had pearl before. it probably got reviewed quite some time ago...

but good memory; very sharp.